04.12.2004
can opener
vabwo. umphier. gludge. ouloo. gonad. GONAD!
GONAD!
GONAD!
artificial bunkbed. gump. sermphiea. bledgoo. aul. lunkhead. LUNKHEAD!
LUNKHEAD!
LUNKHEAD!
especial gene. blued. glore. arkoil. skid. SKID!
SKID!
SKID!
jelly. Botticelli's jelly, strawberry-colored lemon-flavored. Smear. Florida? Island? Are we going to St. Thomas? How far do you go? Down to Georgia! No way taking a trip. Beaches. Fly? It was awful!
It's just. They just fly around. Million of 'em up the street have to brush 'em down. That's where I need to go. Only. End of May to the end of July.
(These people continue to talk about everything stupid. Stupie. Sometimes there are butterflies in the Botticelli's Jelly, looking striped and ugly. We'll wear you out yet, sasquatch. We've got all kinds of expensive equipment.)
You don't want to go to Cozumel, I've been there. It's too college-y.
(I'm going to cut off my own arm now and throw it over the partition, hope it hits someone in the head. See if they stop talking about snorkeling. Exchange rate. Pesos.)
Cancun's a good way to ease into Mexico. What's this hand/arm combination here that just slapped me in the head? It's bloody, this is getting on my computer, and my shirt. T, did you cut off your arm and throw it? Are you going to clean it up? I think it's going to stain my shirt.
Cancun's not like that. You can't lie on the beach without kids coming up. Your fingers are still twitching over here. Would you like to buy a bracelet? Maybe the doctors can put it on your wrist before they re-attach your arm. You ARE going to have it re-attached, right? We were in the resort part and they would get arrested if they stepped over the barrier.
It's still bleeding on the chair. Someone go over there and see if he's bleeding over there, too. Maybe all the blood is just in the arm and not coming out of him over there. This is new carpet in this office space, it's going to be hard to get the blood out. Why do you think he cut off his arm and threw it?
I think maybe he was out of coffee creamer. Maybe we should get him some creamer and put the arm in the freezer. I don't want to pick it up. Can you come over here and pick up your arm?
Key West really doesn't have a beach. Leah turned 18 yesterday. She wants to go an island where 18 is like. She doesn't want to stay in the states where 18 doesn't do anything for ya. Ew, his hand is grabbing my ankle. T, your hand is grabbing my ankle. Stop it. Why don't you get your arm? Somebody, get his arm. Bring his arm back over there, I have a needle and thread in my drawer. Get his hand off my ankle. It won't let go. T, your hand won't let go. Why don't you clean this up? Do you need some creamer? Maybe someone should get some doughnuts?
They don't load up, obviously, it's just, you'll be, you're on the beach you get a breeze. All the places. The good thing is you'd be in the off-season. Somewhere around. Some places. It would be better to go. Amazing. But you know what? That's when you want to get suntanned. See, T's arm is pale. I don't think he's had a suntan. T, when was the last time you got a suntan? Your arm is pale. I think it's trying to get under the desk. It's not bleeding as much now. Do we have some Windex? Murphy's Oil Soap? I had the sun on my legs. I had her shapes on my legs, because of the sunscreen. What's those money marks on your legs?
T's slumped over in his chair over here, I think he's bleeding to death. Why doesn't someone get the thread? Can't we just sew up the shoulder? I don't think we want T to die in the office, won't it stink? Who do we call if T dies in the office? Should we call someone? John's on vacation. Reverand Sun Yung Moon? Southmoon Under was the hot store in the '70s when I went somewhere. To the moon, five years ago. I went to the moon in the '70s five years ago. No, go away. You look really good in it, too.
I think he's dead now, does anyone know CPR? Is he breathing? Stick a mirror under his nose, is he breathing? What happened? How'd he get his arm off? Why isn't anyone calling anybody? Who's going to finish the billing code? Everyone's going to be on vacation, I don't think we're going to get the deliverable done in time. Should we call the cleaning lady to mop up in here? Are any clients coming Tay?
Well, what we're thinking, too, is if the right thing comes up. Yeah. Four thousands of paper, some laughs. There are a couple of bubble butts. Babble bats. Someone left some tuna out on the kitchen, who left the tuna out on the kitchen. There's a can-opener in the sink, do you think he cut off his arm with that? Can you can-open off your arm? Try to can open off your arm to see what happens.
What if the police want fingerprints?
His hand's already over here on my ankle. What if they think I did it because his fingerprints are on my head?
Why would his fingerprints be on your head if you can-opened his arm off?
Taking naps, say your rosary. What do you mean, Monday? Is this his Sudafed? Should we throw it away? Is anyone going to want to use his medicine? I don't think he'll be needing it.
That's a good one, yeah, he probably won't need it.
